AP English

Fact of the day: the Associated Press writes their postgame recaps in code. And it's not just the writers, the players and the coaches are in on it too. Impossible you say? Impossible is nothing, even in Italian. To demonstrate, please enjoy the following excerpts from the AP recap for tonight's Wizards-Pacers tilt (final score: 113-96, bad guys), as translated by ZA.

"As Roy Hibbert stood at his locker... it was suggested to him that the Pacers are becoming fun to watch."

Translation: God we used to hate watching Pacers games.

Roy Hibbert in response: "A month ago, you wouldn't be saying that, would you? We're out here trying to win games now."

Translation: God I hated Jim O'Brien.

Andray Blatche, on the Wizards effort: "Guys didn't bring no effort. They outworked us on every possession. Nobody brought heart with them."

Translation: Notice how by taking ownership of the criticism, I implicitly manage to exclude myself from it.

Added John Wall, "This game we didn't fight at all. It's getting old."

Translation: All that talk about the Decision, nobody mentioned how Lebron totally left it open for a sequel. Just sayin.